Dancin' DJ's "Teen Dance" nights - 13-18 year old - Acceptable or not? You decide

Columbus Indiana is many things for many different types of cultures, age groups, but one age group in particular is the pre-teens through 18 years where they always say there isn't anything to do in Columbus.

How do I know this? I myself have said the same thing - guess what there still isn't anything to do. While I do enjoy frequenting the free concerts, farmers market, movies, firework shows, parades - they are now routine and not as enjoyable. The crowds don't play fair and they "crowd" in on the street, my views etc - it is all about getting that special spot only to be duped by someone who thinks they deserve the spot in front of me.

The point being many will say there are tons of things to do - and for an outsider that could be true, but us locals well as with any town it's boring.

Kids on the other hand tend to find things to do, and with only a few places to venture to in Columbus to have a good time - that is also limited. Here is what I know kids can do in Columbus - Ice Skating, Roller Skating, Baseball, Basketball, Swimming - guess that sums it up. Unless, you're into gymnastics, band, cheer, football , you have structured routines - so I wouldn't venture in calling it "fun" but rather a choir you're required to do - just like Piano lessons.

A few places attempt to entertain the pre-teens from time to time, The Crump has been known to host events for kids, The Skating rink has "Lock-ins", Foundation for Youth have had dances for 6th graders, and now Dancin' DJ's in the FairOaks mall is hitting the scene by offering a place for pre-teens through 18 to have a "Club Night" experience on Friday nights.

The owners Jean and Don Kingen, who has transformed the old Sam Goody Store into a dance studio, where they offer a different array of services.

One service has gotten parents talking - that is the "Teen Dance" a 3 hour time slot where pre-teens (13) mingle with kids up to age 18 and get the sensation they are "Clubbing". The lights are low, flashing, curtains closed to enhance the effect - all this combined have some thinking this is a disaster waiting to happen.

The problem parents are thinking about during this 3 hour dance party is the lack of supervision, the inappropriate dancing "Grinding" or lack of protection for their child from those who are considered an adult and the adverse influences mingling younger teen girls with older males can have.

We spoke with the owner Jean about some of the concerns and asked a range of questions to help ease the minds of parents. Keep in mind, we didn't expect her to acknowledge the "rumors" or think she would bring up any problems they have had - not that there were any, but no business owner would want to place any negative light upon their business.   

We will post some of the photos of said "grinding" (or check them out here) and you can make the call about whether you believe it is too close or not. (UPDATE - new policy has been set in place since we spoke with Jean about the grinding, it is no longer allowed). She also didn't want anything mentioned about the grinding in this article.

We asked Jean "what was the reasoning behind the "no grinding" policy?"

"We do not want anything at all about grinding in the article."

I can say, that this would be a good policy to have - and would win some points with the parents.

Jean "I'm sure it will too"

How does Jean and Don address the age - they use "trust" and ID's, if ID's aren't available because of age, or left at home - deciphering their age by looking at their face - if they "look" 13, they can enter, if they look 18 or younger they can enter - reports of 20 year old, 12 year old entering the dance have been surfacing.

We also have parents who are concerned with the kids "grinding" or rubbing on each other, as one teen who witnessed it said "kids rubbing all over each others junk" - this is alarming to some, but not to Jean and Don - why?

"Jean and Don are dance instructors and "grinding" in an inappropriate way is stopped, Jean says we know the difference in the different types of grinding. It is done mostly with the girls, but we do stop the "grinding" if it seems to be getting out of hand. "

How long have you had Teen Dance's?

We have had 8 teen dances so far, we are DJ's by trade, whenever we are open on a Friday or a Saturday we are having a teen dance - we are having one every weekend or every other. Could be every other Friday or every other Saturday.

What is the age of the teens?

We allow 13-18 year old, we do check ids if they have them. They did not want anyone older than 18 or anyone younger than 13.

What if the kids don't have an ID

"We judge by their face - or if they look older we ask for their ID"

Kids who do not have ID to confirm their age is understandable, but what about kids who have ID but forgot it?

"We have to trust the kids words regarding their age if they do not have an ID."

What do you do about monitoring, and what do they watch for?

"We do have older people incognito as security - they could be 21-23 years in age, they are our eyes around the entire room. They are watching for, Kissing or anything too much - we don't allow anything that is too vulgar or inappropriate.

Who determines the level of inappropriate behavior - what is or isn't inappropriate?

"We use personal judgment, our guts to determine the level of appropriate behavior.  We've said at times, you're too close and it ends.

On the other hand if someone thinks it isn't too much, but another person does, then whatever it is, is stopped"

How do you keep the problems down - no fighting, arguing, etc?

"The kids are well behavior - Rules we DEMAND respect. When the kids arrive they have to be in an orderly fashion, no gum, no chewing tobacco - (no gum, because we've invested in the establishment) The curtains are closed because it goes with the club night which accent the lighting.

We always know where everyone is in our area, there is nothing going on that we don't know about.

We, (Jean and Don) have 3 older children, we know how the program works, we're not naive by any means. We're not afraid to stop anything - if we were to see anything that was a little too much for us we stop it.

Neither I or Don are backwards whatsoever when it comes to people acting right. "

We've heard parents aren't allowed to visit, is this true?

"No - We encourage every parent to come and visit us and ask questions.  We want parents to know where their kids are, we want them to see our place, we want to show them around.

We really admire parents who want to come meet us, see our place, we want them to know their kids are in good hands, we won't let anything go on we don't want our own kids doing.  We want the parents to have the confidence their kids are OK with us for 3 hours.

We also need to instill in the parents be there at 11, cause if you arrive at 11:15 we're going to worry about them. Be responsible and pick up your kid and if not, we will make sure they get home safe."

Can the kids go outside and come back in - take a break?

"NO - they have to stay inside, but if a child needs to leave they need to have a parent pick them up.

We don't even let them go to the mall area to make a phone call either, we have a quiet area in the back where they can make calls if they need too. "

Can a kid leave with another kid at the club like with one of the 18 year old in attendance (Adult)?  

"No - our Rule is - they can't leave - if they need to go we make sure their parents are there to pick them up.

We haven't had the situation where a younger person wants to leave with an older person, when and if that arises, we will supervise that situation closely."

What if a child wants to leave without telling someone?

We have a security guard at the front door, he is 63, he is firm and good with these kids. We have 3 people at the door at all times. We stay until everyone is admitted and people arrive all the way up to 10:30. We also have 3 in the concession area.

So to sum up - visit the place, take an interest in where you drop your kids off. Think of the think of the environment you're placing your children in; ask yourself is it the best place for them?

Think about this - What will these 13-14 year old girls learn from mingling with these older boys 16, 17, and even 18 year old (adults), will they be influenced to be curious about things they shouldn't be at such a young age? I worry about the behavior going on in such a large group that can't be seen by "eyes" all around.

What the Kingen's have done is create an environment which they believe is to be safe, clean, fun. It's up to you to take an interest in your kids, or you can be one of those parents who drop and go.

**this is all recorded

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